Friday, March 25, 2011

Heartbreaking week

On March 22, 2011 we lost one of the most important person in our lives.

I was woken up by my sister in law frantic on the phone that our worst nightmare came through. Bo's Mom passed away. She has been sick with breast cancer then it went into remission and came back as bone cancer. Slowly we watched the painful disease take over her life. We visited this summer so that Bo could see her since he had a weird feeling that he was going to deploy, which he did. She became more sick a month or so ago but we thought despite that she was hanging on and we all really thought she would be around for Bo's return. But that didn't happen and I had to break the news to my husband in Afghanistan that his Mom has left this earth. That is probably the hardest thing I have ever done in my life and to hear his sobs miles away tore me apart.

I did the Red Cross message and his unit was really great with already getting the paperwork started to get him home. But his travels has been a nightmare. He left Wednesday night and is still in route and with troubles of the route they need to get him home and also them losing his luggage. If things work out right he will be home late tomorrow night or Sunday morning. Then we have an 11 hour drive to his home on the coast of MS.

I have my moments of breakdown. I don't even know how we will all react, mostly the kids when we see her. It is so surreal right now that its hard to digest. I am excited to see my husband but I didn't want to see him in these conditions. But all I have to think of is we all have to be there for each other through this difficult time.

I am not sure what else to say...I was going to keep this off here but I need to write it out. I already miss her and yet it hasn't sunk in deep yet that she is gone. I have my moments and hopefully can get it out of my system so that I can be strong for my husband who just lost his Mother. Please pray for all our family that we can all get through this.

I have to share this is a photo of Bo and his Mom on our wedding day in Alaska. She was so beautiful in the color green. It always brought out her eyes. This picture sits at his night stand besides the picture of him and I. We are the two most important women in his life. I thank her so much for raising such a wonderful man that I chose to spend the rest of my life with.

Bo and his Mom September 11, 1993

Dad and Mom with me on my graduation day from college in MS.

Grandma, Grandpa and Uncle Charlie with the boys

Grandma and Grandpa with the boys Summer 2010

Bo and his parents Summer 2010

I miss you so much Mom, but I hope you are now with no pain and suffering and being pampered by angels.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

A Celebration of Life....

Our news, and our emails nowadays seem to be just inundated with mental images of how life can be devastated in minutes by a natural disaster or how a person you were communicating with can be gone forever. Japan's disaster dominates the pages of our news and reminds us of how powerful and uncontrollable our world can really be. At the same time receiving news of the passing of a cousin and a friend who happened to also be family sunk deep in my heart. The shock came in such a way that I couldn't even outwardly cry, its was a painful weeping inside.

All this came in such close proximity to my birthday and at first of course it was hard to even think of celebrating anything. But I had to. Despite all of what can be sorrowful I have to still appreciate that I am not just breathing another day but was blessed with being able to have lived another year. We have to celebrate the life we are given, what else is there to look forward to if nothing is worth living for? I have a million things worth living for and the the top of that list are my boys and my husband. So when I celebrated my birthday it was not just my day, it was a day of being surrounded by those dear to me and enveloped with love from all my family and friends.

That day started with a wonderful dinner out with my two handsome boys. Then coming home to a handmade card from them both created by Jared and Red Velvet Cupcakes baked by Nick and decorated by both for me. :) The thoughtfulness and the togetherness was the best gift I could have ever asked for and so I know in my heart this is not just another day. It is a day to celebrate life and everyday after should be constant celebrations of "living" the life given to me.

Nick Baking

Red Velvet Cupcakes

My special cupcake, LOL!

Then my week took an even better turn when I received a phone call from a dear online friend being in town. We have known each other now for years and first met in Bowling Green, KY when her and her husband came up after this deployment to Afghanistan to visit his family in Kentucky in 2006. This time where I live is closer to his hometown and they were coming with the two additions to their family and so I was so excited to plan a meet up at our historic Glendale, KY restaurant called the Whistle Stop. Just that moment of being with them elevated my spirits and made me realize how precious friends really are.

2006 Meeting with Brent and Becca

2011 Meet Up with the H. Family

Baby Ellie

Brent, Becca and the Girls

Me, Becca and the her precious girls. :)

Brent and Belle

Princess Belle

Abby and Becca

I had such a wonderful visit with a great family and I already miss them.

In my hectic schedule I try to harness any time I can at all to create and have been happily busy in my creative bliss. It is nice to be able to finally take the time to experiment and just play. Here are some snippets of progressive works.

Experimenting with texture-coarse modeling paste

I finished my third "Get Your Paint On" assignment and will hopefully be sharing that soon. I realized in this class that I do have a bright color palette and that everything inspires me. :) Art Journaling during down times has also kept the creative mode moving. I am now at a point where I need to create everyday, it eases my soul.

I hope that everyone is doing well and that you are also celebrating life in your own ways. :)

People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child - our own two eyes. All is a miracle.
~Thich Nhat Hanh~

Friday, March 11, 2011

Another year older

Once again I have been absent. I am trying as much as I can to be busy with the things I love which is my art along with the boys stuff. Nick went straight into track season from wrestling and Jared has been working out with friends. My belly dance classes has ceased for now as my instructor is getting her new studio ready so I will be taking yoga classes starting the 15th which I am very excited to start.

Also have been busy in the house:
I cleared out the area by my patio doors downstairs for another art space. My art room is pretty but only big enough for it to be my beading station and office area. So I moved all my painting supplies downstairs where I can take full advantage of the natural sunlight. For now it looks bare since I just started down there.

Before picture when cleared-the other side is our entertainment area and the doorway leads to the stairs.

Looking a little more like a working space.

I cannot wait to create more and mostly when the sun will shine through the doors. The weather here has been so dreary that today is the first day I have seen sun and its not raining!

My early birthday presents from Bo came in and I couldn't wait and opened them up last night.:) I love it! Its more art books and 2 of them I have been waiting to have and a Vera Bradley tote bag to carry my sketchbook and art supplies in when I journal on the go. :)

I love how he really thinks of what I need and want and even if it may be simple gifts to most people its from the heart and he knows its the little things I get all excited about. :)

So not sure what the plan is for my birthday yet. Its hard to celebrate it without him here. I know the boys and I will go out to dinner but maybe I will have the day of my birthday a chill out do nothing day.
It is also hard to celebrate with all the tragic world events going on which I wanted to assure everyone our families and friends in Japan and Hawaii are okay, but I am grateful for another year given to me to live my life.

Well just wanted to let everyone know I am still around. About to spend tonight with my favorite group of people. :)